On Resolutions...

I never make resolutions for the New Year. I will, however, make writing goals, but I specifically try not to make "life" goals. But...
I heard something, or read something, or something - I'm not sure exactly where, so if you said it to me, credit yourself in the comments...And I don't remember it word for word, either.
Anyway.
The gist of it was, that you never face something new - a new job, a new chapter in your life, a new year, without wanting it to be your best, without wanting it to be "different". Even if you simply want to be a better person, or enjoy things more, or do the best job you can.
I guess that's why people make resolutions - because it's new. And maybe there's a lot to be said for the hope in that. If you start something new with no hope that it will be different than the old, then how do things ever change? You don't, because you're stuck in that hole of "well, same crap, different time/place/thing". And that's kind of sucky.
Maybe I'm talking about two different things - hope and change - but you can't have good change without hope. So, maybe I do believe in resolutions a little - in the hope and the excitement and the promise of the new. Maybe my problem is with how resolutions are made. You know, the ridiculous laundry list of things that are either beyond your control, or are in your control, but you're never going to do it. Maybe you only say you will because you feel like you have to.
For example: You're a smoker and you know you should quit. You don't really want to, but on New Year's Eve you make a big deal out of quitting because you have to have a resolution. Then, by 12:05am, you say "After I finish this pack", then, the next morning your boss calls and gives you heck because you messed up the Davis account and you say "I'm so stressed right now. I need a new pack, but once that one's done, I'm done too". If you really wanted to quit, nothing would stop you. Stop lying to yourself.
I think that's what bugs me about resolutions.
But the hope thing...I really like that. I do have hope that 2012 will be an awesome year. I also realize some of the things that will help to make it awesome are things within my control. And that's what I have to think about...
Behave!

Year in Review...

Hey, it's only a week late!!
January: New jobs, stink bugs, dead dryers (huh...and my dryer is dead again!), more stink bugs, snow, adjustments.
February: More stink bugs, warmer temps, spaghetti, Supernatural, pictures.
March: Tall Tale Tuesday, Zombie Birthday parties, Quiet month.
April: Slacking, LotR pictures, Surprise 50th Anniversary parties, more stink bugs, motivation, gross Tall Tale Tuesday.
May: Chickens, tornadoes, Retreat!
June: Weird pictures, bad days, Chickens.
July: Camping, Summer Survival, Missing my friend, more stinkbugs, heatwaves, a week off.
August: Summer Survival, weird pictures, Jason Manns, funny notes, things I learned, more stinkbugs.
September: Tall Tale Tuesday, Floods, Weird and random, funny cakes, wedding planning, editing.
October: Weird pictures, random, Halloween, foul pictures.
November: More engagements, being elected president, taking it back, egg pictures, eye issues, guest blogger.
December: Guest blog winners, more eye issues, random, Holidays.
Actually, I posted less in December than I did every month all year. That's kind of sad, but it was a crazy month. Notice how the stink bug posts died off there...apparently, so did they, though we see an occasional one here and there.
And now we're in a new year. Come on, 2012 - show us what you're made of and make it awesome.
Behave!

Getting it Back...

It's kind of obvious my life has changed dramatically this past year. "The Job" has been a huge adjustment - physically, emotionally, and with the family. My writing's taken a hit and so have the opportunities to socialize and have fun. I'm not whining (not really) - just stating fact. I have to do whatever necessary to make sure my family survives. I do it willingly (mostly). but that doesn't mean it isn't without true and major side effects.
It's not over. I'm still adjusting, though I hadn't deluded myself into thinking the adjustment phase would be over quick. I promised the face in the mirror I wouldn't be too hard on it until after the first year - going through each season and holiday and reconfiguring the way things are done. I haven't lived up to that promise as much as I should have because I should be able to do it all, especially if you ask my ages old Superwoman complex. Anyway, I digress...
The first year is coming to an end soon, and I can tell. I feel more settled, more energetic, ready to focus. I don't say much about the job, but suffice it to say it's very complicated and requires an insane amount of mental energy and focus. I have at least a million things to remember every day - and what I have to remember changes frequently. Maybe I've finally trained my brain to separate and can shake off the busyness of my days enough to re-focus my energy on other things after I leave. Maybe it's because I've made a decision to pass off some of my volunteer obligations (as I take on a huge one with my writing chapter...hrm) I don't know, but I do feel different. Maybe it's because 2011 is almost over...and well, wouldn't that just be like me to finally get my act together the year the world's supposed to end? Ha!
2011 definitely hasn't lived up to its expectations in many ways. And, as usual (and probably delusional) I am ever hopeful for 2012.
I'm thinking about my goals for 2012 (not resolutions, because resolutions suck). I don't know if I'll post them or not, but I will have some definite goals written down and will do my best to get to this time next year with the ability to say Done!.
So, go away 2011...you suck! Bring on 2012!
Behave!