Wednesday, January 06, 2010

An Open Letter

Dear Spammers,
I respectfully request you no longer send me emails. For one, I do not have a penis. It would be impossible for me to consider your enlarging concoctions. I am not interested. Nor am I interested in buying cheap prescription drugs. Besides, I'm pretty sure that's illegal. Furthermore, I will not pose as some dead guys long-lost family member. I will not send you my personal information so you can secure funds into my accounts and if I cared about your causes, I would belong to them already.
Please stay out of my inbox.
Thank you.


vickyb said...


Ava Quinn said...

I don't know. Enlarging concoctions sound somewhat enticing. And cheap drugs aren't illegal. Especially if they're to enlarge something. And I'm expecting my funds transfer from Nigeria any day now. So, see, that's not spam. It's important stuff.

No! You behave! ;)

Victoria said...

LOL, Ava! You crack me up!

Natalie J. Damschroder said...

You guys know that Nigeria thing goes back to the 40s, right? Well, I got a new (to me, anyway) incarnation of it this week. An e-mail from the FBI, telling me they negotiated the payment of my sweepstakes winnings directly to Bank of America, and they'd release it as soon as I paid $320 in fees to the foreign bank officer, and ONLY TO HIM. It was OFFICIALLY SIGNED by the FBI director, so it was all true, right? Especially the part where, if I didn't get my $800k, I'd get $3,000 instead. Um, okay.

Victoria said...

Check on the Nigeria scam. Wow on the new version. I haven't gotten that one yet. Wow.