Answer!

Well, the sad truth is, all of the text messages are true.
Let me 'splain some of them...
1. Tiny guns for wood nymphs - K1 and I being silly over the things he needed to pick up from the store last weekend.
3. Can i have a kitten? - K2 trying to convince me. As if.
6. THIS TP IS SOFT!! - Yes, the kid texted me from the bathroom to tell me that.
11. U have my pants - Came through while I was in the middle of a meeting and I couldn't stop laughing. My sister informing me I never returned her dress pants.
13. Yup it kinda tickled but hurt at the same time - K1 on his new tattoo.
15. Cow shaving? - We'd passed a bunch of cows and K2 said, "Aww, the cows are shading each other." I thought she said the cows were shaving each other, so...
17. I just got pulled over. - And I did. And I wasn't driving and texting, I was waiting at a red light.
19. What is that meat? Looks like hamburger. - Me texting my brother after he joined B for scout camp and left some mystery meat in the cooler.
So there you have it. A small glimpse into the weirdness of my life.
Behave!