Stole this from
Natalie.
Ask your kid(s) these questions and write them down exactly how they respond.
Okay, a lot of work went into this. Do you know how hard it is to get answers from four kids on four different schedules. Just so you know: K1 is almost 20, K2 is 17, K3 is 12.5, and K4 is 9 and they all think they're funny.
1. What is something mom always says to you?
K1: Why are you being a d.b?
K2: Do the dishes.
K3: Time to do dishes. I love you.
K4: What do you want for dinner?
There's a lot of talk about dishes...maybe if people would do them without me having to remind them...2. What makes mom happy?
K1: Supernatural, or liquor.
K2: Getting out of the house.
K3: Stuff.
K4: Me listening.
Obviously, K3 had no idea and K2 believes I'm trapped here against my will. ha!3. What makes mom sad?
K1: The rum is always gone.
(Are you sensing the beginning of a trend?)K2: Us laying on her when she's trying to take a nap.
K3: When you yell at her.
K4: Me not listening
(Another trend)4. How does your mom make you laugh?
K1: How we think alike.
K2: By pushing me off the couch when I'm laying on her when she's trying to take a nap. By asking me stupid questions like these.
K3: Asking weird questions.
K4: By saying weird stuff.
Apparently I say a lot of weird things.5. What was your mom like as a child?
K1: Responsible
(said while laughing behind his hand.)K2: I don't know. I wasn't born back then.
K3: Like a child.
K4: Loud and obnoxious.
6. How old is your mom?
K1: 41
K2: 39
K3: 92
K4: 40
92? What the heck? I'm 41.7. How tall is your mom?
K1: Mad short.
K2: Taller than me.
K3: 3"
K4: 5' something
3"?? I'm 5'2".8. What is her favorite thing to do?
K1: Write
K2: Write and sleep.
K3: Read funny books.
K4: Be with her family.
9. What does your mom do when you’re not around?
K1: "I don't want to know"
K2: Cry.
(because I'm not here with you.)K3: It's a mystery.
(said with flailing hands and "the" mystery voice.)K4: Write and have her friends over.
10. If your mom becomes famous, what will it be for?
K1: Writing
K2: Writing
K3: Writing
K4: Being a comedian and writing
A comedian?11. What is your mom really good at?
K1: Being annoying
K2: Being a mom
K3: Writing
K4: writing, but nobody's discovered her yet.
12. What is your mom not very good at?
K1: Being scary.
K2: Being a man.
K3: Making fire.
K4: Catching colds.
Being a man? I don't often try to be a man, or make fire for that fact. And I can too make fire!! 13. What does your mom do for her job?
K1: Write
K2: A Mom.
K3: Write books and talks on the phone.
K4: Write and take care of us.
14. What is your mom’s favorite food?
K1: Captain Morgans
(I said he had a theme going on)K2: Stuff that goes in your mouth.
K3: The edible kind.
K4: Chicken
15. What makes you proud of your mom?
K1: Everything
K2: That she asks me stupid questions.
K3: She writes books.
K4: She's always there for me.
K2 obviously was having some issues with the content of this.16. If your mom were a cartoon character, who would she be?
K1: Marge Simpson or Lois Griffin (Family Guy)
K2: Batman
K3: Potato Woman
K4: Squidward in the morning, SpongeBob in the afternoon
Potato Woman? 17. What do you and your mom do together?
K1: Watch redneck videos and laugh.
K2: Talk about random, stupid questions. We live together and we eat together and we talk together.
K3: This quiz. Cook. Eat dinner. Talk about books.
K4: See movies, go to lunch, make dinner.
18. How are you and your mom the same?
K1: In a lot of ways - same sense of humor and the way we think of strange and funny things.
K2: Uhhh...we have the same hair color and we're both girls. We're creative. She drove a truck when she was my age like me.
K3: We both like to read. We like cooking.
K4: We're both girls. We both have hair.
(I think she meant the same color hair) We're in the same family. We both like to read. We both like Daddy.
19. How are you and your mom different?
K1: She's old. I'm young. She's a mom. I'm a son.
K2: I'm shorter. I'm not a mom.
K3: I'm a boy.
K4: Mom's older and doesn't go to school.
20. How do you know your mom loves you?
K1: She makes fun of me and calls me names.
K2: She lets me live here.
K3: Because she says she loves me and she lets me live in the house.
K4: She tells me all the time and by the way she takes care of me.
Monkey see, monkey do...21. Where is your mom’s favorite place to go?
K1: The Outer Banks and the liquor store.
K2: In her dreams.
K3: Cape Hatteras.
K4: The beach.
So there you have it. K1 turned into total randomness because he thought he was too funny with the liquor comments. K2 just laughed the whole time. K3 laughed as well, and coherent answers had to be pulled from him...i.e. Come on, your sister already said that. K4 took it very seriously.
Scary stuff, huh?
Behave!